Ghosts of Mars

Dir: John Carpenter
Starring: Ice Cube, Natasha Hentsridge

In the world of film blogging, two blogs stand out head and shoulders above the rest: Narry Borman and Acidemic.

So, when I noticed Ghosts of Mars in the top 25 films ever list on Acidemic, I immediately watched it. I love John Carpenter. I love Jennifer Carpenter. I love all the Carpenters. But this is just bad.

I understand why Acidemic would place it on his top films ever list, though. Narry B always maintains that films are a far more personal experience than most people recognize. Standard rating systems of 'stars' cannot properly quantify a film's quality. Because films are like dreams. Sometimes you watch a film and it's your dream - there's something about your past experiences that makes you identify with that film - irrespective of quality, sometimes.

But with Ghosts of Mars, I failed to find anything to identify with. It's an interesting idea: A traditional gunslinging Spaghetti Western set on Mars. There's some tension as the 'good guys' are surrounded and have to find a way out. But it's all very flat and predictable and falls into ludicrous shoot-em-up territory too often.

In classic Carpenter stylee, the sets, script, music and acting are sometimes atrocious, albeit in an honest and likable kind of way. The peak of this atrocity is Jason Statham, who for some reason in this film walks like Charlie Chaplin and breathes like an asthmatic teenager who has just been on a 20-mile run.

There are far better Carpenter films out there. Sorry, Acidemic.

Rating: You Tell Me (ooh, it's deep!)